1
00:00:01,740 --> 00:00:05,719
Henry, we've had a million Friday nights
and I want to start actually doing

2
00:00:05,720 --> 00:00:06,770
stuff together.

3
00:00:06,771 --> 00:00:08,659
I always say not to Laura's wee ideas.

4
00:00:08,660 --> 00:00:10,680
And they want her. James Martin live!

5
00:00:11,180 --> 00:00:13,230
But I could be a wee bit more open
-minded.

6
00:00:13,320 --> 00:00:14,520
Vincent, what's wrong?

7
00:00:14,940 --> 00:00:16,040
I'm... dying.

8
00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:19,900
Again? He said I've got fatty liver.

9
00:00:20,620 --> 00:00:25,559
Get yourself a fat couch and personally
train me. We've not had a fight like

10
00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:27,000
this for a long time. Ma!

11
00:00:27,001 --> 00:00:28,079
What is it?

12
00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:29,360
I've stole this dress!

13
00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:37,800
Vincent's going too deep with this
fitness kick, Laura.

14
00:00:37,801 --> 00:00:41,119
Yeah, I think it's great he's making
positive health changes.

15
00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:42,500
No, you're not getting this.

16
00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:45,220
I like to make love at midnight.

17
00:00:45,221 --> 00:00:46,319
I know.

18
00:00:46,320 --> 00:00:47,700
We shared a villa in Majorca.

19
00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:52,099
Well, Vincent says that that can't
happen now because it messes with the

20
00:00:52,100 --> 00:00:53,600
his wearable sleep tracker.

21
00:00:56,020 --> 00:00:57,580
I think this is good for Vincent.

22
00:00:58,480 --> 00:00:59,530
It's not.

23
00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:05,950
After all these years, Vince and I
finally get ourselves in an amazing

24
00:01:06,970 --> 00:01:08,210
And he's ruining it.

25
00:01:14,450 --> 00:01:15,670
You want to be finished?

26
00:01:16,390 --> 00:01:19,050
Soon. It's never good to interrupt him
during it.

27
00:01:19,330 --> 00:01:20,610
He gets very immersed.

28
00:01:20,611 --> 00:01:22,169
What's it called again?

29
00:01:22,170 --> 00:01:23,220
Be our body pump.

30
00:01:29,090 --> 00:01:30,140
Whoa!

31
00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:37,179
Here, listen, I was wondering, if I was
just a stranger who walked in here off

32
00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:40,040
the street, what would you recommend?

33
00:01:42,020 --> 00:01:43,400
Will we give her the patter?

34
00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:49,920
Mrs Scott, it amazes me to hear that
you've never done modelling before.

35
00:01:50,460 --> 00:01:51,940
I know, right?

36
00:01:52,580 --> 00:01:55,940
Hayley, describe those lips, because I
wouldn't be allowed.

37
00:01:56,400 --> 00:02:01,200
Luscious. And describe the jawline,
because if I speak, I am in trouble.

38
00:02:01,640 --> 00:02:03,350
Natched. Not a thing needs done.

39
00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:05,070
Send her on her way, I say.

40
00:02:05,530 --> 00:02:06,580
Agreed, agreed.

41
00:02:06,970 --> 00:02:11,849
However, if you did want all the Ryan
Reynolds of the world to want you as

42
00:02:11,850 --> 00:02:14,030
own personal wrecksome... Hmm?

43
00:02:16,190 --> 00:02:18,840
Laura, are you thinking of getting
something done?

44
00:02:19,210 --> 00:02:20,350
No. I mean,

45
00:02:21,250 --> 00:02:22,300
maybe.

46
00:02:22,750 --> 00:02:23,800
Why not?

47
00:02:24,390 --> 00:02:26,370
New things, new adventures, right?

48
00:02:26,630 --> 00:02:30,429
I don't want to be... Waiting around for
this empty nest thing to hit me. You

49
00:02:30,430 --> 00:02:33,020
know, I want to be driving things,
thinking bigger.

50
00:02:34,370 --> 00:02:39,190
Well, listen, I could definitely improve
stuff on this wee fixer -upper here.

51
00:02:39,550 --> 00:02:41,110
But don't tell Henry I said that.

52
00:02:41,250 --> 00:02:45,130
Oh, God, no. Let's not mention this wee
consultation to Henry at all. Never.

53
00:02:45,550 --> 00:02:46,690
You know what he'd like.

54
00:02:47,090 --> 00:02:48,390
But can I have a brochure?

55
00:02:49,610 --> 00:02:50,660
Yes.

56
00:02:51,350 --> 00:02:52,400
But listen,

57
00:02:53,070 --> 00:02:56,170
Henry can never be this, all right? Oh,
not a chance.

58
00:02:57,940 --> 00:02:59,990
Oh, here I'm forgetting why I dropped
in.

59
00:03:00,420 --> 00:03:02,160
Yours and Bonnie's character card.

60
00:03:02,420 --> 00:03:05,000
Oh, hi, hi, hi, hi. Character card?

61
00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:07,300
Mm -hm, for my murder mystery night.

62
00:03:08,140 --> 00:03:09,760
This is how I live life now.

63
00:03:10,020 --> 00:03:15,179
I don't just have people over. I throw
parties, and I am throwing a murder

64
00:03:15,180 --> 00:03:16,300
mystery party!

65
00:03:17,320 --> 00:03:20,920
An invitation to dinner, but who will be
murdered?

66
00:03:21,580 --> 00:03:23,500
Every dinner Laura makes is murder.

67
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:26,480
I'm the unthinkable Molly McGarvey.

68
00:03:26,910 --> 00:03:29,810
I survived the Titanic, but that's not
true.

69
00:03:30,170 --> 00:03:32,340
I was emotionally destroyed at the end
yet.

70
00:03:33,390 --> 00:03:35,590
Oh, love this role.

71
00:03:35,850 --> 00:03:39,520
You know, the great Mr. Jeremy Strong
from Succession is my spirit animal.

72
00:03:39,750 --> 00:03:41,690
I might go full message with this one.

73
00:03:42,390 --> 00:03:47,089
I am a woman whose marriage was
destroyed when her husband couldn't pull

74
00:03:47,090 --> 00:03:48,430
out of a midlife crisis.

75
00:03:49,110 --> 00:03:52,030
And now I shall read from my character
card.

76
00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:56,800
I managed to get that one.

77
00:03:57,740 --> 00:03:58,820
Luck of the draw.

78
00:04:02,360 --> 00:04:06,040
I'm the brilliant scientist, Professor
Albert Eissentine.

79
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:07,450
No, sorry.

80
00:04:08,300 --> 00:04:09,350
Eissentine.

81
00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:13,720
Eissentine. I hope you don't start
getting typecast as a genius.

82
00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:18,579
Baron von... Oh, for s***.

83
00:04:20,079 --> 00:04:21,939
Tell me we don't have to wear costumes.

84
00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:33,480
And, eh, the nappy stations get
everything labelled.

85
00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:35,100
I don't think I need labels.

86
00:04:35,420 --> 00:04:36,860
Oh, the labels are not for you.

87
00:04:37,180 --> 00:04:39,220
They're for Professor Einstein there.

88
00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:41,880
CBB's on for the way, they say.

89
00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:45,920
Aye. This Iggle Piggle is somebody, by
the way.

90
00:04:47,580 --> 00:04:49,520
OK. Thanks for doing this, Adam.

91
00:04:50,020 --> 00:04:51,640
My ma just refuses to help it.

92
00:04:52,180 --> 00:04:58,399
Her wayne, she can watch it. The next
nappy I want to see getting changed will

93
00:04:58,400 --> 00:04:59,450
be my own one.

94
00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:01,340
Can I, um, use the kitchen?

95
00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:04,340
Make dinner for your wee girlfriend?

96
00:05:04,341 --> 00:05:06,659
Yeah. I'm babysitting my wee cousin with
Sophie.

97
00:05:06,660 --> 00:05:09,359
It'll be nice to get some alone time
away from our flatmates.

98
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:10,410
Just us.

99
00:05:10,680 --> 00:05:12,300
You's got to be pumping. Colette?

100
00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:14,920
No, no, it's fine if you are.

101
00:05:15,580 --> 00:05:16,630
It word to the wise.

102
00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:17,930
Keep the noise, Jim.

103
00:05:18,300 --> 00:05:21,910
That asshole next door apparently hates
hearing a woman enjoy herself.

104
00:05:21,911 --> 00:05:23,419
Two women.

105
00:05:23,420 --> 00:05:24,480
You'll fod the polis.

106
00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:27,120
Aye, you won't.

107
00:05:31,020 --> 00:05:32,380
My name is Chives.

108
00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:34,420
I will be your butler this evening.

109
00:05:35,140 --> 00:05:37,440
Thank you all for coming to our party.

110
00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:41,980
Chives and I have arranged a wonderful
evening of mystery and secrets.

111
00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:44,280
So let's all just enjoy.

112
00:05:44,860 --> 00:05:45,910
I mean,

113
00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:49,400
we're trying with Adesha Kertz and I
gave my scabby queen.

114
00:05:50,340 --> 00:05:53,420
Please now make your introductions to
each of the guests.

115
00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:59,220
My name is the esteemed professor.

116
00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:01,240
Albert Frankenstein.

117
00:06:02,060 --> 00:06:06,600
Eisenstein. I see you've invented
sleeves for your clothes, Professor.

118
00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:08,680
A miracle in itself.

119
00:06:08,980 --> 00:06:12,600
My name is Baron von Winkledinger.

120
00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:18,639
You know, I've always thought you looked
like a Winkledinger. And I've just

121
00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:21,620
realised he's going to be doing an
accent all night.

122
00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:22,970
Are you, Vincent?

123
00:06:23,180 --> 00:06:24,230
Oh, yeah, baby.

124
00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:27,380
My name is Arizona Buffalo.

125
00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:30,600
And my catchphrase... It's your bullet.

126
00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:34,320
And I'm going to whip all you guys in a
shape.

127
00:06:34,321 --> 00:06:38,019
Well, you'd know all about that, all
this exercise you've been doing.

128
00:06:38,020 --> 00:06:39,070
Cheers to that.

129
00:06:39,460 --> 00:06:41,080
Laura's supposed to be on my side.

130
00:06:41,840 --> 00:06:44,120
Oh, I'm really sorry.

131
00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:46,770
Hi.

132
00:06:48,480 --> 00:06:49,530
Yeah.

133
00:06:50,860 --> 00:06:51,910
Hey.

134
00:06:52,180 --> 00:06:53,230
Mate.

135
00:06:53,380 --> 00:06:57,379
Listen, I hope nobody was planning on
drinking that ginger, because let me

136
00:06:57,380 --> 00:06:58,379
you something.

137
00:06:58,380 --> 00:06:59,430
You blew it.

138
00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:01,860
Bonnie, you're up.

139
00:07:04,880 --> 00:07:07,020
Betty the scullery maid.

140
00:07:08,260 --> 00:07:09,880
I don't even have a surname.

141
00:07:10,640 --> 00:07:13,920
How exactly were these roles decided,
Laurel?

142
00:07:14,180 --> 00:07:15,480
Completely random, sir.

143
00:07:15,880 --> 00:07:20,980
Oh, so completely randomly, your mum
gets to dress like a glamorous showgirl.

144
00:07:21,180 --> 00:07:22,230
Lucky me.

145
00:07:22,440 --> 00:07:28,999
Whilst I sit in a shapeless big...
Granny puffed with the suggestion that I

146
00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,360
am submissive to my betters.

147
00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:35,320
There's no room in here for that.

148
00:07:35,321 --> 00:07:36,799
Thanks, Laura.

149
00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:37,850
Thanks.

150
00:07:38,140 --> 00:07:40,820
Ma? Oh, God, then do I have to do an
accent?

151
00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:44,480
My name is Naughty Sally Spoon.

152
00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:48,620
Naughty. Henry will no be saying naughty
that later on the night.

153
00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:52,180
I bet she's been practising the accent
for weeks.

154
00:07:52,740 --> 00:07:53,790
No.

155
00:07:55,180 --> 00:08:00,300
Here's your egg, fried tomato, and a
black pudding.

156
00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:01,940
Pudding. Pudding.

157
00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:05,740
I love the idea of being a naughty
flapper girl.

158
00:08:06,380 --> 00:08:08,220
Hopefully nobody asked me to dance.

159
00:08:08,620 --> 00:08:12,920
I suppose since I'm a flapper, I should
probably do that dance that they do,

160
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:14,080
whatever it's called.

161
00:08:14,340 --> 00:08:15,600
Don't anyone ask me to do?

162
00:08:18,100 --> 00:08:19,380
Oh, right then!

163
00:08:20,020 --> 00:08:23,630
I can't even remember what the name of
it is, is it? Is it the Charleston?

164
00:08:28,170 --> 00:08:29,690
Charleston Heston, mer -like.

165
00:08:31,850 --> 00:08:36,729
Well, I'm the unthinkable Molly
McGarvey. Did they nor put enough bricks

166
00:08:36,730 --> 00:08:38,548
the bag when they flung you into the
canal?

167
00:08:38,549 --> 00:08:42,230
Listen, I'll boot you in the ham hock,
Baron Von Bightman banger.

168
00:08:42,470 --> 00:08:44,790
Oh, no, sorry, absolutely not.

169
00:08:45,530 --> 00:08:49,590
What? This family has done parties this
way for years.

170
00:08:49,591 --> 00:08:50,919
What, why?

171
00:08:50,920 --> 00:08:56,779
It starts with banter and then slaggings
and then someone takes it too far and

172
00:08:56,780 --> 00:08:58,580
Vincent has an emotional breakdown.

173
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:02,280
No, we are trying something different
this time, all right?

174
00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:07,100
We're going to have a family party that
doesn't end in a screaming match.

175
00:09:07,820 --> 00:09:08,880
Let's be realistic.

176
00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:12,590
We're going to have some nice family fun
and murder someone!

177
00:09:14,980 --> 00:09:17,930
And there's to be no eye -rolling at one
of Laura's parties.

178
00:09:18,460 --> 00:09:20,220
I will keep my eyes.

179
00:09:20,890 --> 00:09:21,970
Perfectly different.

180
00:09:23,350 --> 00:09:25,170
I think Ronnie hates me tonight.

181
00:09:30,850 --> 00:09:31,900
Baby sleeping.

182
00:09:32,770 --> 00:09:33,820
Delicious.

183
00:09:34,070 --> 00:09:36,510
And I love this house. Everything's so
sparkly.

184
00:09:36,511 --> 00:09:38,309
It's like being at the shows.

185
00:09:38,310 --> 00:09:39,390
That's mine, Colette.

186
00:09:39,970 --> 00:09:46,010
It's not how I decorate a house, but...
This is nice, eh?

187
00:09:47,050 --> 00:09:48,370
Nae flatmates, nae drama.

188
00:09:48,890 --> 00:09:49,940
Just us.

189
00:09:49,980 --> 00:09:53,760
When you live in a student flat, there's
always other people about.

190
00:09:53,761 --> 00:09:56,239
My mum and dad are worried about an
empty nest.

191
00:09:56,240 --> 00:09:58,060
I'd kill for an empty nest.

192
00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:00,120
Just you and me watching the telly.

193
00:10:00,340 --> 00:10:01,660
Like an old married couple.

194
00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:03,920
Kissing and cuddling on the couch.

195
00:10:04,540 --> 00:10:06,000
Kissing and cuddling.

196
00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:11,760
What's that smell?

197
00:10:12,300 --> 00:10:13,620
Who's eating a pot noodle?

198
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:17,200
Oh, what is she doing here?

199
00:10:20,031 --> 00:10:22,489
It's there in your moment.

200
00:10:22,490 --> 00:10:23,689
That's what happens then.

201
00:10:23,690 --> 00:10:29,509
I made an excuse to go to the toilet,
and then... Help! Help! Don't see the

202
00:10:29,510 --> 00:10:30,560
done!

203
00:10:31,430 --> 00:10:32,480
Here we go!

204
00:10:32,670 --> 00:10:33,720
Here we go!

205
00:10:35,090 --> 00:10:36,790
No! No, Colette!

206
00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:38,620
Oh, God!

207
00:10:38,830 --> 00:10:40,130
Who could have done this?

208
00:10:40,650 --> 00:10:41,700
Wasn't even acting.

209
00:10:43,210 --> 00:10:47,070
Everyone, please, examine the crime
scene closely for clues.

210
00:10:47,530 --> 00:10:48,670
I can't believe you did.

211
00:10:48,810 --> 00:10:50,070
I know, it's sad.

212
00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:52,200
Can you get a pillow for my head?

213
00:10:53,700 --> 00:10:56,640
Ah, exactly what a murderer would do.

214
00:10:57,040 --> 00:10:59,220
Place a cushion under the victim's napa.

215
00:10:59,580 --> 00:11:03,779
Maybe I should go get a brush and creep
around the body like a scullery maid in

216
00:11:03,780 --> 00:11:06,420
a big, shapeless frock. What do you
think, Laura?

217
00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:07,850
I don't like this.

218
00:11:07,851 --> 00:11:10,399
It's made me think about you actually
being dead.

219
00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:11,700
We'll find my killer then.

220
00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:15,680
And remember, it's just kid on, like the
wrestling.

221
00:11:17,100 --> 00:11:18,150
Wait.

222
00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:19,900
The wrestling's kid on?

223
00:11:21,770 --> 00:11:24,830
There will now come in a round of
interrogations.

224
00:11:30,750 --> 00:11:31,800
Shh, shh, shh.

225
00:11:32,730 --> 00:11:37,010
See the last line fillers in here? Do
they actually work? Oh, absolutely.

226
00:11:37,450 --> 00:11:39,970
You look like you have me left a day in
your life.

227
00:11:41,410 --> 00:11:42,460
Okay.

228
00:11:42,690 --> 00:11:43,740
Sign me up.

229
00:11:44,650 --> 00:11:46,550
You hide that artifact, baby.

230
00:11:47,310 --> 00:11:49,970
Make sure that the Nazis don't find it.

231
00:11:53,520 --> 00:11:55,000
He's like an athlete now.

232
00:11:55,660 --> 00:11:56,860
Why are you whispering?

233
00:11:57,400 --> 00:11:59,240
And why was he studying your face?

234
00:11:59,540 --> 00:12:00,590
Did you get done?

235
00:12:00,700 --> 00:12:01,750
No!

236
00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:02,930
Frown for me.

237
00:12:03,260 --> 00:12:04,310
Shh!

238
00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:06,420
No Botox.

239
00:12:06,740 --> 00:12:12,340
But I am tempted. I did have a wee
consultation, so... Ladies?

240
00:12:13,260 --> 00:12:15,670
But for God's sake, don't say anything
to Henry.

241
00:12:21,060 --> 00:12:22,740
He's like an athlete now.

242
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:25,400
She knows how miserable he's making me.

243
00:12:25,700 --> 00:12:27,480
Oh, cheer up. It's a party.

244
00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:30,740
You try living with the Scottish Wim
Hof.

245
00:12:31,040 --> 00:12:32,940
Aye. Wim Hof, I blame.

246
00:12:33,940 --> 00:12:36,860
At least you knew Darren was a gym bore
when you met him.

247
00:12:37,540 --> 00:12:40,840
Aye. I'll bore a hole in your napper
with the Hilla Molly shoe.

248
00:12:41,500 --> 00:12:43,480
Stop spoiling, Laura's party.

249
00:12:43,980 --> 00:12:46,220
This party is the Titanic, darling.

250
00:12:59,480 --> 00:13:03,220
So, ask insightful questions and try to
solve the crime.

251
00:13:03,580 --> 00:13:04,630
Sir?

252
00:13:04,980 --> 00:13:08,140
I have, like, no idea who it is.

253
00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:09,850
Okay.

254
00:13:10,140 --> 00:13:11,280
Insightful questions.

255
00:13:12,300 --> 00:13:14,520
Baron, did you murder Molly?

256
00:13:15,660 --> 00:13:19,400
Do you think I'm just going to go, aye,
and that's the game done?

257
00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:24,460
Maybe. You have to get there by a
process of elimination, Darren.

258
00:13:25,300 --> 00:13:27,040
I'm not a real scientist, Laura.

259
00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:31,240
Betty, your turn, sir.

260
00:13:31,680 --> 00:13:34,930
Why do you keep saying sir all the time?
That's not a butler thing.

261
00:13:35,400 --> 00:13:37,330
Before I was a butler, I was in the
army.

262
00:13:38,180 --> 00:13:39,860
Fritz did a number on me in Belgium.

263
00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:41,640
Left me with a dicky lung.

264
00:13:42,380 --> 00:13:44,240
A nice lawyer legend.

265
00:13:44,700 --> 00:13:50,099
Oh, Vincent, one of my friends shared a
Facebook memory today of her doing Tough

266
00:13:50,100 --> 00:13:53,340
Mudder, and I thought Vincent should do
that.

267
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,580
Maybe you and Henry could... No.

268
00:13:56,380 --> 00:13:57,430
I get it.

269
00:13:57,740 --> 00:14:03,379
Laura wants to transform herself to mask
the pain of a looming empty nest. And

270
00:14:03,380 --> 00:14:08,300
she finds the kindred spirit in the king
of Transformers himself, Optimus Prick.

271
00:14:08,820 --> 00:14:10,160
Well, not at my expense.

272
00:14:10,500 --> 00:14:16,639
Forgive me, kind ladies and gentlemen,
but I must speak my truth as God is my

273
00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:19,680
witness. Bonnie, that voice is amazing.

274
00:14:20,180 --> 00:14:23,420
Sounds like the voice of a stone -cold
killer to me.

275
00:14:24,180 --> 00:14:26,360
Stone -cold Jane Austen.

276
00:14:27,130 --> 00:14:32,970
As a member of the serving class, it
pains me to speak when not spoken to.

277
00:14:33,190 --> 00:14:35,410
But I can hold my tongue no longer.

278
00:14:36,050 --> 00:14:37,100
Oh!

279
00:14:38,990 --> 00:14:40,090
Apologies, Mum.

280
00:14:41,190 --> 00:14:42,870
It's my chronic TB.

281
00:14:46,550 --> 00:14:51,669
Much like the great Brad Pitt, I feel
compelled to fill my mouth with food

282
00:14:51,670 --> 00:14:52,720
whenever I act.

283
00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:57,420
Have you noticed how Miss Spoons keeps
buttering Mr.

284
00:14:57,640 --> 00:14:58,690
Buffalo up?

285
00:14:59,380 --> 00:15:01,300
You're amazing, Mr.

286
00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:02,730
Buffalo, she says.

287
00:15:02,980 --> 00:15:07,419
Paying no heed to her good friend Betty,
who says she's at the end of a bleeding

288
00:15:07,420 --> 00:15:08,470
tether.

289
00:15:08,900 --> 00:15:11,880
What? She ain't being a good friend.

290
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:16,120
And a bad friend is capable of anything.

291
00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:20,980
We'll see what naughty Sally Spoons has
to say about that.

292
00:15:21,390 --> 00:15:24,550
Maybe you ought to watch your damn
mouth, sweetheart.

293
00:15:25,310 --> 00:15:30,070
Maybe if Betty butted Mr. Buffalo up
once in a while, I wouldn't have to.

294
00:15:30,690 --> 00:15:36,289
Maybe Miss Spoon should wind a bleeding
nicey -nicey neck in before someone

295
00:15:36,290 --> 00:15:37,340
rings it.

296
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:43,149
Maybe Betty has a real high and mighty
opinion of herself despite her low

297
00:15:43,150 --> 00:15:48,830
station. Maybe Miss Spoon should
explain.

298
00:15:56,339 --> 00:15:58,440
So, who did you say is the murderer?

299
00:15:59,940 --> 00:16:03,460
Doesn't feel as nice to think the
Titanic as I thought it would.

300
00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:06,300
Is that one of Vincent's brochure?

301
00:16:08,940 --> 00:16:11,500
You're dead, ma 'am. You can't... Shut
up, ma 'am.

302
00:16:12,020 --> 00:16:13,580
I'm a ghost that loves the drama.

303
00:16:15,380 --> 00:16:20,719
When I popped into Vincent's surgery the
other day, I... We had an impromptu

304
00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:22,680
chat about my face.

305
00:16:23,180 --> 00:16:24,380
It was no big deal.

306
00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:26,010
You blew it.

307
00:16:27,380 --> 00:16:28,430
No big deal.

308
00:16:29,660 --> 00:16:32,100
Bonnie, you have been a brat tonight.

309
00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:33,890
A brat?

310
00:16:34,820 --> 00:16:37,410
I didn't want you to make a big thing
out of it, Henry.

311
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:42,880
Me? Yeah, you would have been all like,
why would you touch that lovely face?

312
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:44,170
You're so...

313
00:16:45,069 --> 00:16:49,510
Beautiful. You're already perfect and
gorgeous as it is, Laura. Aye, all

314
00:16:49,630 --> 00:16:53,270
Ora. Well, send me to jail for thinking
my wife's a stunner.

315
00:16:55,790 --> 00:16:57,070
I'm not making a big deal.

316
00:17:01,330 --> 00:17:07,250
Did you suggest that Laura needed to
change her face in any way whatsoever?

317
00:17:08,130 --> 00:17:13,630
Exactly the type of fighting that I did
not want at my party. Thank you, Bonnie.

318
00:17:14,270 --> 00:17:16,990
Look, I just said what I always say,
right?

319
00:17:17,410 --> 00:17:20,990
Every woman over the age of 22... 22?

320
00:17:21,490 --> 00:17:22,540
Don't a minute.

321
00:17:22,910 --> 00:17:26,190
What? Were there any wounds on Molly's
body?

322
00:17:26,810 --> 00:17:28,970
Aw, you still playing the game.

323
00:17:29,390 --> 00:17:31,090
Well, at least someone is.

324
00:17:31,710 --> 00:17:33,030
Now wounds on the body, sir.

325
00:17:34,190 --> 00:17:37,150
Can we get back to games and get on
secrets?

326
00:17:37,570 --> 00:17:40,270
No. Real secrets are more fun.

327
00:17:40,630 --> 00:17:41,990
And here's another one.

328
00:17:43,140 --> 00:17:46,340
Vincent, all your fitness crap.

329
00:17:46,780 --> 00:17:47,830
What, you hate it?

330
00:17:48,740 --> 00:17:49,790
That's no secret.

331
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:53,020
It's made you an unrecognisable bore!

332
00:17:53,460 --> 00:17:56,900
I hate this stranger who is sleeping in
my bed right now!

333
00:17:57,840 --> 00:17:59,440
There's a stranger in your bed?

334
00:18:01,760 --> 00:18:02,810
You meant Vincent.

335
00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:06,160
I'll keep solving the murder.

336
00:18:10,860 --> 00:18:12,620
You're not a bad wee cook hen.

337
00:18:13,740 --> 00:18:15,790
You're going to get that from your
mammy.

338
00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:18,800
So what are yous doing in here?

339
00:18:19,780 --> 00:18:21,660
Babysitting on a Saturday night?

340
00:18:21,980 --> 00:18:23,900
We're just helping out Auntie Colette.

341
00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:25,330
My hole.

342
00:18:26,120 --> 00:18:27,440
They're playing at houses.

343
00:18:28,140 --> 00:18:31,040
Erin is playing mammies and daddies.

344
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:35,100
Or should that be mammies and mammies,
as it were?

345
00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:38,170
Did you think I was doing a trial run
for domestic life?

346
00:18:38,171 --> 00:18:39,559
See, when I said this was news.

347
00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:43,220
You weren't thinking that I was actually
wanting to, like... Oh, my God.

348
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:46,860
You lasses should be up there dancing
this weekend.

349
00:18:46,861 --> 00:18:48,159
So,

350
00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:51,400
but I can look after the rain for one
night.

351
00:18:54,020 --> 00:18:55,560
Are you sure about this, Gran?

352
00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:57,310
Absolutely.

353
00:18:57,660 --> 00:19:00,340
No plane who says for you two.

354
00:19:00,620 --> 00:19:01,670
Thanks, Mrs Scott.

355
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:03,530
Oh, Uber's here.

356
00:19:04,500 --> 00:19:05,550
Thanks, Gran.

357
00:19:09,810 --> 00:19:10,860
Hey.

358
00:19:12,670 --> 00:19:15,030
And which the story be you,

359
00:19:15,910 --> 00:19:16,960
Boyd?

360
00:19:21,570 --> 00:19:23,150
You want a secret, Vonnie?

361
00:19:23,970 --> 00:19:26,470
Well, all Arizona Buffalo's got a doozy.

362
00:19:31,490 --> 00:19:32,540
I'm dying.

363
00:19:33,650 --> 00:19:35,930
What? I'm dying.

364
00:19:42,360 --> 00:19:43,410
Well, I'm no dying.

365
00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:45,300
Why would you say that then?

366
00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:49,000
Not any mere, not any mere, right, but I
was dying.

367
00:19:49,820 --> 00:19:53,140
When? Back when I began all this fitness
stuff.

368
00:19:53,380 --> 00:19:54,580
That was where I started.

369
00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:58,840
I mean, I wasn't dying, dying.

370
00:19:59,060 --> 00:20:00,460
For Christ's sake.

371
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:04,560
I've got a condition, right? I've got a
condition that can lead to death.

372
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:06,050
Which rang with you?

373
00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:09,660
I've got a fatty liver.

374
00:20:11,370 --> 00:20:12,420
A fatty liver?

375
00:20:12,730 --> 00:20:13,780
What?

376
00:20:14,570 --> 00:20:15,620
Fatty liver.

377
00:20:15,950 --> 00:20:17,650
F -A -T -T -Y.

378
00:20:17,651 --> 00:20:18,949
Fatty liver.

379
00:20:18,950 --> 00:20:24,869
What in God's name is a fatty liver?
It's a liver condition, but actually

380
00:20:24,870 --> 00:20:27,100
an insensitive name. Are you okay,
Vincent?

381
00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:28,389
You see?

382
00:20:28,390 --> 00:20:29,890
Care and compassion.

383
00:20:30,190 --> 00:20:31,510
See, my brother's wife.

384
00:20:31,511 --> 00:20:33,469
Don't you worry, Vonnie. Don't you
worry.

385
00:20:33,470 --> 00:20:34,730
I'm going to be just swell.

386
00:20:34,850 --> 00:20:39,250
I'm going to be just... Because of this
obsession that's ruining all your fun.

387
00:20:39,660 --> 00:20:43,400
Well, you didn't tell me, for that is
really unfair.

388
00:20:44,020 --> 00:20:45,600
Do you know what I think? What?

389
00:20:45,900 --> 00:20:50,760
If there's no wounds in the body, Molly
might have been poisoned.

390
00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:53,730
Oh.

391
00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:57,450
Fatty liver.

392
00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:01,850
I'd understand if you'd say you had a
fatty arse.

393
00:21:02,300 --> 00:21:04,470
You wife stole body shame in my arse,
Henry.

394
00:21:04,820 --> 00:21:06,220
Why didn't you tell me?

395
00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:22,479
I don't know how that heat of his works,
but I know that whatever's going on in

396
00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:24,300
there, he'll be thinking about me.

397
00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:29,580
Am I so monstrous that you can't even
share a health scare with me?

398
00:21:29,900 --> 00:21:32,600
You did call this party the Titanic.

399
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:37,040
And yourself an iceberg earlier, so...
Oh, my God.

400
00:21:37,260 --> 00:21:38,440
I am an iceberg.

401
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:40,050
Cold.

402
00:21:40,940 --> 00:21:41,990
Unfeeling.

403
00:21:42,820 --> 00:21:43,960
Enormously impactful.

404
00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:45,480
I'm away to play Dede again.

405
00:21:47,180 --> 00:21:50,100
Well... A wee lesson for us all the
night, I'd say.

406
00:21:50,660 --> 00:21:51,710
What lesson's that?

407
00:21:52,260 --> 00:21:54,020
That is where secrets get you.

408
00:21:54,360 --> 00:21:57,540
First rule of life, don't keep secrets
for your family.

409
00:21:58,480 --> 00:21:59,880
Shut up, man.

410
00:21:59,881 --> 00:22:04,139
I mean, what is a family but a load of
secrets that can live with each other?

411
00:22:04,140 --> 00:22:08,480
When I was struggling, you's all told me
no to keep things bottled up.

412
00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:11,140
So let the secrets out, I say.

413
00:22:13,180 --> 00:22:16,360
All right, well, I've got one I've been
keeping inside.

414
00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:18,180
Oh, my God, I've got one.

415
00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:19,540
I've been offered a job.

416
00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:21,490
Dancing.

417
00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:24,640
London. Michael rang me.

418
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:26,250
Michael Ball.

419
00:22:28,100 --> 00:22:34,819
Vonnie! I am so angry with you right
now, but that's amazing! Are you so

420
00:22:34,820 --> 00:22:36,820
excited? No, I'm furious.

421
00:22:37,300 --> 00:22:38,400
I'm not taking it.

422
00:22:38,660 --> 00:22:39,840
No. No way.

423
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:41,490
Get out!

424
00:22:42,060 --> 00:22:45,240
I thought that... Where were they when
everything was shit?

425
00:22:45,870 --> 00:22:50,230
Why do they have to wait till I've got
my school and we've fallen in love

426
00:22:51,170 --> 00:22:52,430
I saw that anger recently.

427
00:22:52,590 --> 00:22:54,670
It was never really about me.

428
00:22:55,230 --> 00:22:57,370
No, it was mostly about you.

429
00:22:57,670 --> 00:22:59,350
Right. But it was never about Laura.

430
00:23:01,410 --> 00:23:03,530
Look how excited you got for me there.

431
00:23:04,610 --> 00:23:05,660
I'm sorry.

432
00:23:07,530 --> 00:23:08,630
I've been a brat.

433
00:23:11,910 --> 00:23:12,960
So?

434
00:23:14,510 --> 00:23:15,890
What's your secret, Laura?

435
00:23:18,730 --> 00:23:21,050
May I ask what it is you're doing, sir?

436
00:23:22,330 --> 00:23:24,050
I've invented an antidote.

437
00:23:24,051 --> 00:23:25,429
She's no deed.

438
00:23:25,430 --> 00:23:26,670
She's just in a coma.

439
00:23:27,030 --> 00:23:31,190
Or my name is the Professor Frank and
Albert Steiner.

440
00:23:31,890 --> 00:23:33,630
Quite brilliant, sir.

441
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,080
Professor, you saved my life.

442
00:23:47,380 --> 00:23:49,020
No. It was all you.

443
00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:50,880
Too strong to die.

444
00:23:51,960 --> 00:23:53,010
Unsinkable.

445
00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:55,380
But no unpumpable.

446
00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:04,850
Ta -da!

447
00:24:04,851 --> 00:24:06,219
I'm alive.

448
00:24:06,220 --> 00:24:08,380
The Professor created an antidote.

449
00:24:11,330 --> 00:24:15,669
Maybe it's not time for my secret just
now. Nobody's even figured out who the

450
00:24:15,670 --> 00:24:16,720
murderer is.

451
00:24:17,470 --> 00:24:18,850
You're the murderer, Laura.

452
00:24:19,410 --> 00:24:20,460
You're the murderer.

453
00:24:20,810 --> 00:24:21,860
What?

454
00:24:22,170 --> 00:24:23,220
You all knew.

455
00:24:23,750 --> 00:24:24,830
The whole time.

456
00:24:25,390 --> 00:24:27,070
Can read you like the gruffalo hen.

457
00:24:27,270 --> 00:24:28,320
Oh.

458
00:24:28,321 --> 00:24:29,289
All right.

459
00:24:29,290 --> 00:24:31,550
Well, here it is.

460
00:24:33,590 --> 00:24:35,730
I don't want to live in this house
anymore.

461
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:42,920
Okay, um, I've got a horse needs
feeding. I think I'll mosey along.

462
00:24:43,860 --> 00:24:47,060
Terrible case of the consumption to dial
back at the manor.

463
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:49,050
You, um,

464
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:51,860
don't want to live here anymore?

465
00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:58,859
I go into Erin's bedroom and she's not
here now and I hate it and I'm going to

466
00:24:58,860 --> 00:25:01,270
hate going into Jason's bedroom when he
goes to.

467
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:04,700
I just, I think it would be good for us
to go somewhere new.

468
00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:06,650
I'm out on a walk.

469
00:25:06,670 --> 00:25:12,569
that these haunts have put into making
this house nice for you. But we are

470
00:25:12,570 --> 00:25:16,269
sentimental and nostalgic, Henry, and
this place will keep us longing for the

471
00:25:16,270 --> 00:25:18,470
past. I put my heart into this place.

472
00:25:19,070 --> 00:25:20,120
So did I.

473
00:25:20,310 --> 00:25:25,970
But this place should be full of love
and noise and kids running around.

474
00:25:26,390 --> 00:25:28,070
This should never be a quiet house.

475
00:25:28,930 --> 00:25:35,809
I know I've never been good at showing
my love with romance or spontaneity

476
00:25:35,810 --> 00:25:36,860
or...

477
00:25:37,010 --> 00:25:38,470
Fancy sex positions.

478
00:25:39,850 --> 00:25:46,550
How I show my love is with skirting
boards and kitchen units and paint.

479
00:25:47,150 --> 00:25:54,049
I show my love with slabs and plaster
and coats of varnish and dowels and

480
00:25:54,050 --> 00:25:56,910
decking and dwangs.

481
00:25:57,850 --> 00:26:00,870
I show my love with dado rails.

482
00:26:01,250 --> 00:26:03,950
This is the most emotional B andQ advert
I've ever seen.

483
00:26:03,951 --> 00:26:06,569
It's no Vincent having the break down
the night, is it?

484
00:26:06,570 --> 00:26:09,050
This house is my love.

485
00:26:09,790 --> 00:26:10,840
For you.

486
00:26:11,410 --> 00:26:12,460
This house is me.

487
00:26:13,650 --> 00:26:14,710
Every part of it.

488
00:26:15,770 --> 00:26:18,010
Sorry for doing a shite near Laron
Henry.

489
00:26:18,930 --> 00:26:20,450
Not the time, Molly.

490
00:26:21,050 --> 00:26:22,490
That was no thinkable either.

491
00:26:23,230 --> 00:26:24,910
You wanted to know my secret.

492
00:26:24,911 --> 00:26:28,769
I mean, I've been trying new things for
you, Laura.

493
00:26:28,770 --> 00:26:29,820
I know you have.

494
00:26:30,570 --> 00:26:31,650
I got a tattoo.

495
00:26:32,190 --> 00:26:33,970
I've had my face... facialed.

496
00:26:33,971 --> 00:26:35,199
No, I'm...

497
00:26:35,200 --> 00:26:36,560
Deen my nut dresses.

498
00:26:37,240 --> 00:26:38,520
Baron Vaughan.

499
00:26:39,100 --> 00:26:40,940
Winkle. Dinger.

500
00:26:43,060 --> 00:26:44,140
All for you.

501
00:26:45,980 --> 00:26:49,120
But I'm not moving for this horse,
Laura.

502
00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:51,360
That's too much.

503
00:27:00,660 --> 00:27:02,120
What are dwangs?

504
00:27:05,280 --> 00:27:06,900
Everything's changing too fast.

505
00:27:07,260 --> 00:27:08,440
A different house now.

506
00:27:08,980 --> 00:27:10,240
I don't see any standards.

507
00:27:11,120 --> 00:27:14,100
Ian Beale has been in that same house
for about 30 years.

508
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:16,420
I want to be Ian Beale.

509
00:27:22,440 --> 00:27:23,920
Hot chocolate sack.

510
00:27:24,840 --> 00:27:25,890
Oh,

511
00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:27,050
cute.

512
00:27:29,960 --> 00:27:31,420
God, it goes so fast.

513
00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:46,540
This maca -paca is affy's heat.

514
00:27:54,020 --> 00:27:59,040
You start thinking about this charity
night. Come on, get your past empty ten.

515
00:27:59,280 --> 00:28:02,280
Michael Ball phoned me with a huge
opportunity.

516
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:04,000
It's not an offer, Vincent.

517
00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:05,480
It's an audition.

518
00:28:05,800 --> 00:28:08,690
Show them that you've still got it. Then
tell them to stick.

519
00:28:08,691 --> 00:28:12,639
Jason's moving all of these weird wee
men out of the house.

520
00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:14,080
I'm lifting it higher.

521
00:28:14,620 --> 00:28:15,900
It actually feels real.

522
00:28:16,420 --> 00:28:17,620
What are you doing?

523
00:28:18,380 --> 00:28:20,000
Henry and Laura, part two.

524
00:28:20,540 --> 00:28:22,060
Five stars on the poster.

525
00:28:23,460 --> 00:28:24,640
I took the job.

526
00:28:25,180 --> 00:28:27,140
Vincent says no.

527
00:28:28,300 --> 00:28:29,780
Wee Vincent says no.

528
00:28:29,830 --> 00:28:34,380
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